All of us pet owners know that embarrassing situations are a part of having a pet. They're funny, they're cute, and because they have no shame whatsoever, we end up dealing with the aftermath of their innocent (and sometimes not-so-innocent) behaviour. Plus let's not forget, our love for them can make us do silly things in an effort to either protect them or to make them happy...
Here are some of the many stories we've heard from other pet owners. Get ready to laugh (and maybe cringe, just a little...)!
"My dog, Timbit, and I were at the dog park one day. All the dogs were playing and having a good time. All of a sudden I saw a woman pick up Timbit and start walking away with him. I called to her and she didn't turn around so I freaked out that she was trying to steal him. I ran up to her, snatched Timbit away and started yelling at the woman. Then I realized that Timbit was standing at my feet and I had just grabbed a stranger's dog away from her. The dog wasn't even wearing the same colour harness. The whole entire park full of people were staring as I stammered out a few dozen apologies."
"We were sitting around the campfire while my dog napped on his blanket inside our tent. Some time later we heard lots of laughing, giggling, and even snorting. I looked around to see a giant silhouette of my dog, cast by the light of our campfire, as he enthusiastically 'romanced' a pillow."
"My dog picked up a funny habit of standing up like a person when he wants to see something better. My whole family thinks this is hilarious, but it turns out that not everyone does. We were out hiking in the woods one day and Koda stood up when he spotted someone approaching in the distance. I saw the person take note of Koda. Instead of laughing like I expected her to, she stopped in her tracks and pulled out her bear spray! Koda is a 100-lb, black Newfie-mix. It hadn't occurred to me that maybe Koda's cute little habit wasn't so cute when hiking in bear country! All ended well, thankfully."
"I had my family over to dinner to show them how grown-up I was and that I had learned to cook. We were having appetizers in front of the TV when my youngest sister started screaming hysterically. My hamster had escaped from her cage (again), and had gorged herself on some of the food and was fast asleep on the platter."
"I was out on a walk in a busy park with my dog, Kuma. I tie his leash around my waist to leave my hands free. This has always worked well because Kuma is usually very gentle and well-behaved. Unfortunately, I had never before seen what happens when he spots a squirrel: he took an enormous leap towards the squirrel, toppling me like a tree onto my face, and then dragged me for several yards until I could put on the brakes. Everyone saw."
"My best friend brought her 2-year-old daughter for a visit. This was a Big Deal, since we hadn't seen each other in years (she lives in another city). The first thing my dog did when he met her daughter was to clutch her around the waist and hump her. He was undeterred when she fell down, crying. He's never humped anything before or since."
"My loving little Cassie-cat met my boyfriend for the first time. She approved of him very much and spent the evening lying in his lap and giving him purrs and cuddles. He awoke later that night to find her special gift to him, a freshly killed mole, on his pillow just a few inches from his face."
"Kiwi is my parrot. He was originally my mom's parrot, and when I was younger I thought it was funny to teach Kiwi lots of colorful swear words and insults. It's not that funny anymore; Kiwi swears at everyone who comes to my house. I tried to teach him to say nice things but all he does is swear at me too."
"A woman I'd been dating for only a few weeks came over to my house for dinner. I introduced her to my cat, Simba, and explained that Simba was very friendly and loved to sit on laps. My date was delighted... until Simba delicately jumped up onto her lap, turned around a couple of times, then squatted and took a dump. Luckily, my date took it in stride. She's still my girlfriend and Simba hasn't repeated his performance. I'm convinced he was testing her to see how much of an animal-lover she really is. My little buddy was just looking out for me!"
"I was walking my dog across a major intersection. As we crossed the street in front of a fully-loaded school bus, my dog decided it was the perfect time to poop."
"I'm sure you've heard lots of poop stories. This is another one. My dog, Rascal, is young and has a ton of energy. I brought him to my friend's house because she said she would watch him for me when I had to go away for a week, but she wanted to do a trial run first for a night. As I was telling her how well-behaved Rascal is, he finally stopped zooming around her living room long enough to poop out an earplug right in the middle of her rug. Then he get the zoomies again."
"My dog did a 'walking poop' on a busy sidewalk in front of a group of tourists taking pictures. I had to slowly follow him with a bag for 30 or 40 feet while he took his sweet time."
"My dog has a special love: human crotches. He will jam his pointy snout into anyone's crotch to say hello while inhaling deeply and happily wagging his tail. I try my best to intervene before he can do this but I'm not always fast enough. He did this to my father-in-law the very first time they came over to meet me."
"My cat has a horribly embarrassing habit. She loves to pick my dirty underwear out of the laundry hamper. She then hugs it tightly to her body as she naps. When I try to take it away from her she'll kick me violently with her back legs."
"Cheyenne is my lovely mutt. I used to kiss her on her nose when she was a baby and tell her sweet-nothings. Now I have to do this all the time before she will allow me to go about my business, otherwise she'll stick her muzzle right in front of my lips and wait (she'll even block me if I try to go around her). It doesn't matter who's around - my friends, my boyfriend, my in-laws, the mailman, the repair guy... it could be the tax man or the coroner, and it wouldn't matter to her. I have to give her a resounding smooch on the nose and croon to her, 'Who's my most beautiful girl? You are! You are!" If I don't do it to her satisfaction, she'll keep blocking my way until I do.
"My cat loves everyone and thinks that we exist to pet him. He'll sit politely next to guests to wait for attention. If they don't give him some love after a few minutes, he'll sit up against the couch like a human with his back legs sprawled wide open. Then he proceeds to slowly groom himself between the legs, while staring our guest straight in the eyes. Guests either laugh, act totally embarrassed, or try hard to pretend they don't notice him. We tell them that he's 'lovesick' and the way to make him stop is to pick him up and blow raspberries on his belly."
"When you love and laugh abundantly, you live a beautiful life."